Tuesday, August 19, 2014

August 19th, 2014 The Here and Now

August 19th, 2014 The Here and Now

What a beautiful day. The outpouring of support for my big announcement in last night's post was a breath of fresh air. My friend and talented writer Tony Posnanski at theantijared.com even wrote a story about this coming together of "The Fitness Instructor and The Man Who Never Ate A Salad."  After reading what Heather wrote in her blog and the piece from Heather included in Tony's story, I immediately sent her a text asking if I had some of the facts wrong. Apparently my memory of how the events unfolded, ultimately bringing us together, was a little off from how they actually unfolded. I trust Heather's memory 100%. As she put it in her text reply, "You were pretty distracted." Apparently, I combined two different speaking event experiences into one. The details of our meeting were largely the same, I just placed them in a different order based on my slightly flawed memory of the events. I almost forgot that I did two speaking events for that company within months of one another. A small one and a big one. It was an exciting time. Still, not quite as exciting as the reality of the here and now!

I decided to try something different for lunch today (see tweet below). I had a few options ready to go in the employee kitchen, but for whatever reason I wasn't in the mood for anything normal. I decided to try something new and different. I have a digital food scale at work too! I accurately measured 1.5 servings of all natural sugar free peanut butter and 2 servings of 100% all fruit sugar free strawberry spread. I topped a couple of corn tostada shells with these two ingredients and added some thinly sliced apple on each. I named this new idea "PB&J Flats" ("New," unless I'm not the first to think of this simple combination). It was sugar free but my taste buds didn't know the difference. My brain did know the difference, because again--no effects, no compulsions to binge, no extra spoonfuls. I'm in awe of how different my behavior is around this former "trigger food." It wasn't the peanut butter triggering me, it was the sugar in the peanut butter, obviously. I've measured every single bite I've taken from the jar and I've done it without struggle or concern to the contrary.

I normally do not mention my private and personal therapy sessions or the details in each. But I must mention how today was the very last one scheduled. Not by my choosing, mind you! My beloved therapist is moving to the Pacific Northwest. For the sake of confidentiality, I will not mention her name. But I will say her incredible expertise has been an invaluable gift. The timing of how so many of her brilliant and truthful concepts planted in my brain started blooming at the same time, is beyond words in its perfection. Her counsel has helped lead me to where I am today with the emotional and mental dynamics of my life. It was a slightly emotional goodbye. Given the circumstances of today's realities, you couldn't have scripted a better ending to our client/therapist relationship. 

Today's food has been all about trying new things! Variety is good, right? I cooked an incredible dinner this evening before my conference call. I picked up a brand of gluten free/wheat free pasta, a brand my girlfriend Heather recommended for how wonderful it cooks and taste. I topped it with an incredibly delicious homemade sugar free marinara Heather had slow cooked for over twelve hours. She cooked it all day Saturday and sent some home with me. With a side of asparagus, the meal immediately became one of my new favorites! The love of cooking and creating in the kitchen is just one of the many things Heather and I have in common.

I felt like a good walk at the trail tonight. Sometimes it's good to just get out there in the fresh air and feel the breeze through your hair, you know? I didn't quite hit the 5K mark, but close, doing 2.5 miles before heading for the vehicle. It was a walk of reflection on a beautiful day.

My food tweets today:








Don't think I didn't notice the 505 calorie total of my dinner!


Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Strength,
Sean

14 comments:

  1. Hi Sean! Isn't life good?
    I meant to take photos of all my food today like you do but I kept forgetting. I'll try tomorrow.

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    1. Oh Natalie, it is, very.
      The food pics was something that, if you would have asked me six months ago how I would feel about it--I would have resisted and offered up a bunch of justifiable reasons why I couldn't do it, or shouldn't. But Natalie--it has been a transforming experience for me. It has inspired me to eat better, to take extraordinary care and pride in my preparations, cooking and enjoyment of the food I eat--it has slowed me down, allowing me to enjoy and appreciate my food more than ever. I suppose it's all in the perspective we apply. Shifting my perspective and embracing the "extreme" accountability of this practice has made a monumental difference in my journey. My best to you always, Natalie!

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  2. After I read your post and Heather's l, ( who doesn't love a love story), I wanted to comment that this is a great example of not putting your life on hold 'until I get to my goal weight'. So many do that and miss out on living. Happy for you both.
    I would never think to use corn tortilla with the pbj/apple combo, but it makes sense. I'll keep an open mind.:) I had an apple and pnb for snack yesterday . yum

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    1. You said it, PJ. If I were still in my previous way of thinking there isn't any way I would have allowed myself to be open to a relationship UNTIL I reached goal--and I probably would have said something like--"I want to get to a place where I feel much better about myself." But here's the deal: I feel great about me now. I finally get it. And it's a beautiful realization and experience to be released and free to feel great no matter the number on the scale. I truly believe it's without a doubt, the number one epiphany I've experienced in my life, ever.
      Living, indeed!
      The PB&J Flats--oh my-- incredible!! I hope you'll give it a try sometime!

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  3. This seems to be a theme for me as I've said it to many people over the last couple of weeks, but LITERALLY timing is everything! Mr. Helen and I dated briefly, broke up, he moved and we and were separated for 4 years. When he came back in town he looked me up and I was still single. This past May we celebrated our 22nd wedding anniversary. Timing is everything.

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    1. Wow--Helen!! Thank you for sharing this!! That's an amazing story! Congrats on 22 years! I always love it when you take us along for you and Mr. Helen's trips! The photos are always fabulous. Timing--yes, absolutely!

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  4. Your omelettes always come out perfectly! You should do a You Tube video (with Heather!!!:) on how to make them. Making videos as a couple is THE thing. Actually, I might be on to something here. The channel could have a fitness/healthy lifestyle theme to it, not to mention the love story. These You Tubers are making quite the living from their viewership...tempted???

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    1. Oh Dupster-- You very well might be on to something! I'll discuss this with Heather soon. We'll see. Might be a bunch of fun! Thank you for your awesome support and idea!!

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    2. Funny Fact: I recently cooked an omelet for Heather. It was NOT perfect, at all. I nearly burned it. It was wayyyy over-cooked. I sauteed the veggies and had the heat too high--the eggs immediately cooked too quickly--fast!! Slow and easy is the rule! She graciously accepted my less than perfect omelet and enjoyed it anyway. :)

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    3. It was far from burnt! It was a lovely golden brown and delicious! My omelets always turn into scrambled eggs. This is why I opt for the frittata route!

      I'm thinking there may be something to that video thing! ;) Awe, but that means I'll have to put myself together...at least somewhat more than usual...on a Sunday morning!

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    4. You're the best, Heather. Very kind, sweetheart. ;)
      Your Frittata is unbeatable!!
      I'm determined to prepare you the perfect omelet--you'll see!
      We should certainly discuss the video idea.
      Awe-- You always look amazing, sweetie.
      (is this getting too lovey dovey yet?--LOL)

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  5. sigh... You're the bestest :) It's so encouraging to read of all the good things happening in your life, in all areas, relationship and otherwise. Trust me when I say your therapist will miss you. Healthy boundaries in the client/therapist relationship often prevent the "friend" part of a therapist from disclosing too much. That being said, there is often communication of love and respect that goes beyond words. Happy that you're happy, my friend :)

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    1. Jae, thank you!! This means so much coming from you!! You absolutely nailed it here. Best wishes for you as you embark on an exciting year! I just read your latest--and I'm absolutely thrilled for you! I'm going to miss her very much. I didn't quite realize how much until I realized it was over. Isn't that a typical human response? :) I sure appreciated it while it lasted.

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  6. Sounds like you found a wonderful girl Sean! I am so happy for you.
    The You Tube video sounds like a good idea to me. You know I've been encouraging you to get a book out with your recipes with pictures for quite a while now. Both would be good.
    I am just overall super happy for where you're at. I have decided my problem is what you have and need to get sugar out of my diet before I will be able to accomplish anything on a long term, lasting basis. Thank you for helping me with that/

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